Random Post

I have been thinking for a while about how hard it is to start a new habit. This comes to mind after experiencing firsthand failure at trying to form the habit of exercising. I have been trying to get myself to go to the gym for a while, but never achieve it. The process goes like this: I want to go back because I know it brings well-being to my life and I’ll feel great afterward. But when the moment of actually going arrives, there is always something more important to do, or I am simply too tired. I prioritize the 'other more important' thing. Finally, a couple of hours go by, and I feel disappointed in myself because I did not fulfill what I had promised myself I would.

The brain and how it works are very interesting things. The perception we have of situations can influence our behavior. I started to reflect on why this constant failure was happening to me, and I discovered two things. A big part of me has a perfectionist mindset. So, when I make a goal for myself, I go to the extreme of demanding too much. For example, starting from not going to the gym in a month and then expecting me to go at least 5 times a week. When I am setting the goal, it looks like a good idea, but when I have to actually go to the gym, my brain collapses, as it is a very high expectation and requires a lot of effort on my part. In other words, my brain basically shuts down and decides not to even start the task because it knows I will fail. 

I learned in my psychology class the importance of making changes progressively to avoid this happening. First, setting goals that are achievable for the moment is key, so we are not setting ourselves up for failure. Second, adding the habit progressively helps us to actually have the energy to do it when we said we would. In my personal example, instead of expecting myself to go to the gym 5 days a week, I’ll start with 1. Once I have started the habit, I can add more days. The second thing I have reflected on from this experience is the importance of thinking why we are setting a habit. The reason behind it can explain why we have trouble doing it and showing up. Learning about this brain process has helped me to have more self-compassion and to make my process easier for myself. I can be supportive of myself instead of critical and judgmental of my own experience. The approach to life I decide to have makes a difference in my day-to-day.